Conan O’Brien writes about the future of television in the latest issue of Newsweek. The article reads like an extended version of his “In the Year 2000” segment – the attack of the TVs edition.

From Takeover TiVos…

Tough-talking TiVos will even confront viewers, saying, “You’ve watched 40 straight hours of ‘Sponge- Bob’—get off the weed!”

to the Unifying Plasma…

In an effort to bring Red and Blue states together, one giant plasma screen, four miles high, will rise from the central Plains, visible from both coasts.

…he talks about it all.